A Goat Milking Stand

Enlarge Image Image Gallery The completed goat milking stand looks like this. PHOTO: HERBERT HUFF

Not long ago—after grappling with my ornery old goat Eunice just one time too many—I decided that I was due to own a milking stand. Besides hoping that I could save a little of my own hide—and maybe even keep that crotchety nanny from tap-dancing in the milk bucket—I figured I could use the restrainer when trimming the critter's hooves and administering her shots . . . two jobs that have always been difficult for both the nanny and me.

However, my search for a functional commercial milking stand was pretty disappointing. I found one locally. . . but it cost $60 and was so flimsy that I knew darn well Eunice would kick it into kindling in no time flat. Even a search of likely local auctions proved fruitless: I did, at one of the public sales, spy a custom job that looked sturdy enough to take my goat's best kick . . . but unfortunately I would have needed a crane and a flatbed truck to haul the massive frame (made from 4 x 6's) away.

So with my good humor stretched to the breaking point from several hours of fruitless driving, and yet another milking time comin' up soon, I stomped out to the of workshop and set about building my own milking stand . . . a device that would measure up to my specific needs.

The resulting goat-grabber weighs less than 60 pounds, has survived almost a year of Eunice's abuse, and—best of all—can cost less than $18.24 to build (if you recycle some lumber, as I did). I've managed to haul the stand to two fairs (without slipping a disc lifting it), and have trimmed my nanny goat's hooves and administered her injections with a minimum of trouble ... since she'd much rather munch on oats from the feed bin than complain about such small-time nuisances. Indeed, this stand might just be the answer to most any goat keeper's prayers. And—if you'll follow my instructions—I think you'll find it as easy to build as I did.

Precutting You Wood

In my experience, presawing the lumber for a shop project not only saves construction time, but also helps prevent mistakes . . . because it lets a builder understand how the pieces fit together before he or she starts nailing.

Begin by cutting the boards to the dimensions on the chart, but be sure to add 1/16" to each measurement to allow for the saw's width. Plus—if you mark each piece with a letter (according to the chart) after you cut it—you won't have to remeasure the parts later to determine which is which.

Most of the required cuts can be made with a standard handsaw or a power saw . . . they're not in the least complicated. There is, however, one portion of the sawing which might at least initially look a little confusing. You see, in order for the leg braces to fit properly, they must be cut at a 45° angle. Fortunately, there's a shortcut which makes this job a breeze . . . with or without a miter box.

First mark a point 12 inches from one end of your 2" x 2" x 8' board. Then move along another 9 inches and scribe a second spot. Continue this 12-inch-then-9-inch spacing for another four points . . . so that you end up with marks at 12, 21, 33, 42, 54, and 63 inches.